This article will make pornography great again contains sexually explicit material.
On the very same day millions of Americans went to the polls in 2008, the good people at Hustler did what they do every single day: released video of people having sex. The movie of the day was Who’s Nailin’ Paylin, a political parody featuring porn star Lisa Ann, playing former Alaska governor and Republican vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin having sex with a pair of Russian soldiers, who just happened to catch a glimpse of her house from the banks of Mother Russia.
Conservatives gasped, liberals guffawed, and everyone just kind of agreed that a skin flick about someone in the process of running for high office represented a tipping point in the coarsening of American popular culture—something few paid attention to because, at the time, the economy was in total free fall, and people were kind of preoccupied.
Nevertheless, Who’s Nailin’ Paylin entered into the mainstream consciousness in a way that few other porn movies have ever managed to do. Eight years later, 22-year old comedian Elijah Daniel hopes history repeats itself.
“The best case scenario: He watches it, gets a little annoyed, maybe tries to get it taken down.”
Earlier this year, Daniel was a little drunk and messing around on Twitter. He joked that he was going to write an erotic story about Donald Trump. The tweet got a positive response, so Daniel figured he’d open up another bottle of wine and take a few hours and bang something out. By the next morning, Daniel had completed Trump Temptation: The Billionaire and The Bellboy, a 21-page send up of both the presumptive Republican presidential nominee and E.L. James’s guilty-pleasure kink-fest Fifty Shades of Grey.
The book was a hit, becoming a best-seller on Amazon within 48 hours. He posted the story on the online publishing platform Wattpad, where it attracted over a million readers. Now, Daniel has teamed with gay porn studio NakedSword to turn Trump Temptation into a feature film.
Judging by the source material, Trump Temptation may end up skewing more toward funny than sexy. “With his oily orange skin glistening in the sunlight as if he were a soggy Cheeto, his hair unkempt and messy, like a gorgeous rat’s nest. He was beautiful,” one passage reads. “His gorgeous ass flapped behind him like a mouthwatering stack of pancakes in his pants. My hunger for pancakes had never been stronger.”
Daniel says casting is still in progress, but there’s going to be an effort to stay as close to the original source material as possible. He’s shooting for a July 4 release date, both as a birthday present to America and to give delegates at the Republican National Convention, which kicks off in Cleveland on July 18, something to watch while dozing in their hotel rooms after long nights of talking small government over big margaritas.
“We try to differentiate ourselves from other ‘vending machine’ porn companies that take whatever’s happening in culture and ‘just add sex to it. Hustler and some of the big straight studios are good at that — don’t get me wrong. We just find it somewhat… predictable?” Jack Shamama, NakedSword’s creative director told the Daily Dot. “I think the sorts of stories we’re attracted to are ones where there’s a sense of irony and contradiction and even stuff that might make a difference to the absurd notional political conversational that’s happening right now.”
Shamama notes that much of the conversation around Trump has so calcified that little, not even a satirical porn movie can do much to shift anyone’s perceptions. “Trump … [has] done a pretty good job of letting everyone in the entire universe know about him. At best, we can hope the funny, NSFW short Nakedsword produces with Daniel ultimately gets under the narcissist’s leathery, orange skin,” Shamama said. “The best case scenario: He watches it, gets a little annoyed, maybe tries to get it taken down. But it won’t make him drop out or change any voter’s opinions.”
“Now that I think about it,” he added, “if it did change people’s opinions about him, that would be scary as hell!”
Trump Temptations isn’t the only time Daniel has mined the frothy mixture of Trump and sexuality for comic material. Earlier this month, over 20,000 people watched a live-stream of Daniel getting a tattoo on his leg of Trump giving oral sex to a disembodied penis.
https://twitter.com/aguywithnolife/status/733858324089700352
Daniel was also forcibly removed from a Trump event and detained by security for sneaking a very large glitter-covered dildo into a campaign event with the intention of throwing it at the former Celebrity Apprentice host. Even for someone who would go on to get 2016’s most ill-advised tattoo, actually going through with that particular plan would almost certainly be considered a bad idea.
Believe it or not, Trump Temptations is but one of the many erotic interpretations of the 2016 election cycle. Last year, the mysterious ironic gay porn author Chuck Tingle released President Domald Loch Ness Monster Trump Pounds America’s Butt and then followed it up with Feeling The Bern In My Butt, which is packed with “sizzling human on unicorn presidential candidate action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and gay Democratic socialist love.”
“[Trump is] the opposite of anything that should have to do with sex,” Daniel said, explaining his fixation with Trump’s sexuality. “Putting him in uncomfortable sexual settings just makes me laugh. Like when kids swear. It’s cheap comedy, but it makes me laugh.”
Daniel views a Trump presidency as a something of a mixed blessing. “[If Trump wins, Saturday Night Live] will get another four great seasons and I’ll get a bunch more jokes,” Daniel wrote an in email to the Daily Dot. “Until he runs the country into the ground and we all die. But at least we’ll do it laughing!”
