If you like the Super Bowl to bookend your porn habits, Sunday must have been a wondrous day.
With Coldplay announced as the halftime show for Super Bowl 50, porn hub Brazzers decided that it could add more value than the much-maligned rock group to those who were looking to be entertained during the Broncos-Panthers intermission.
So, the online porn company livestreamed its own halftime show that featured, um, its own adventure of a lifetime.
As Brazzers pointed out in its pregame press release, the last time an adult content company had attempted a livestream was Girls Gone Wild in 2005. But as Chris Martin was rocking out with Beyoncé and Bruno Mars in front of tens of thousands of football fans at Levi’s Stadium, this was happening on Brazzers in a free show called ZZ Halftime.
My favorite pornstar @Romi_Rain is showing what she does best @Brazzers #ZZHalftime
— JbTensports (@Justin1133Jb) February 8, 2016
Said Brazzers product director Mario Nardstein in a statement: “The ZZ Halftime show is a fan-based initiative to thank both NFL and loyal Brazzers fans with free content during the Super Bowl. So, if you can’t score with Coldplay, at least you can score with Brazzers.”
Almost as soon as halftime began and the Brazzers show went live, there were couples—men and women, and women and women, and women and women with men—engaging in oral sex and hardcore intercourse, as the host of the show sought commentary from the topless porn stars who were watching nearby.
But the halftime show really picked up steam when the hostess began interviewing the porn stars while they were having sex while giving shoutouts to Twitter users who requested the stars to scream their names while in the throes of faux-ecstasy.
“This is fantastic,” one of the male stars said.
But if we’re talking about the level of noise between the Brazzers porn set and Coldplay’s music, the former was probably more headache-inducing than the latter. Given the choice next year between Brazzers and whatever the NFL serves to us us, perhaps I’ll go with something simple: watch the replay of the Puppy Bowl.
Photo via Brazzers | Remix by Jason Reed